How do i say i love you?
by Ambercatlucky2
Summary: kyo loves tohru, simple as that. but can he tell her? what will he do if he tells her? and then there's always the problem of the damn rat and rabbit. and the immature dog. T for swearing


Hi everyone! Hmmm, well I've watched the first 26 episodes of F.B and I was sure there was more but I checked and there wasn't, it was kind of a disappointing ending, like there should be more to it… I've also read the 2nd and 3rd book, and the 4th & 5th. Haha it's obvious I'm going to read more. :P anyways. This story happens… gee I dunno but um… _after_ Tohru knows about Kyo's secret. If you don't know what I'm talking about then that's fine, and I'm also doing this in Kyo's POV. randomness… well better get started!

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**Kyo's POV**

I caught myself looking at Tohru's face again, her eyes, her smile…

"Dammit what am I doing?" I shouted pissed at myself for continually stealing glances at her.

It's not like I was like that creepy fan club of Yuki's who went around and stalked her all day like how they stalked that damned rat. I just well, she was defiantly different than most people, sure she pissed me off, everyone did, Yuki especially, but it was a different type of anger that she gave me, not a sort of 'I'm going to punch your damned face in you bastard', or in Shigure's case 'sick bastard' but she made me feel really uncomfortable, the way she just went about life, she just did it looking at the silver lining in everything, even in me, the cursed cat of the zodiac, what had she said one time?

Oh yeah we were all like onigiri (rice balls) and that our qualities were the umeboshi (fillings? The flavour stuck on the back of an onigiri), she said that she could see my umeboshi clearly, and I know can defiantly see hers clearly

"So clearly" I mumbled

"What is it Kyo-kun?" she asked me looking at me with that space-cadet confused look on her face

"It's NOTHING!" I shouted back I could feel my face beginning to burn red, she kept looking at me

"Geez! Can't you go study or something, like make some food?" I asked anxiously and angrily; she beamed

"O-okay! I guess your just hungry than! I'll go make dinner!" she got up, and smiling all the way began to head to the kitchen humming some tune I had never heard.

"Oh Sohma-kun, what are you doing in the kitchen?" I heard her ask that rat, he answered in that annoying almost girlie voice of his

"Well I just finished picking some of the vegetables from the secret base, and I was wondering if you would like to use them"

"Oh, thank you Sohma-kun!" she said cheerily

"Also Honda-san, I was wondering, could you teach me how to cook?"

…Really? REALLY? That's all he wanted, to use her to learn to cook? At least I already knew how to, that damned ra-

"Oh and Kyo just so you know, I picked LOTS of leeks for you" he shouted with a smirk, of course, it was like he could read my mind, and he had to get leeks, of all the most disgusting things in the world leeks had to be the most.

"DAMN YOU YUKI, I HATE LEEKS!"

"I'm sorry Kyo-kun, I forgot again, hehe silly me! Don't worry I'll cook you something else, what would you like, I could make some fish or maybe…" I zoned her out at that point, dammit why did she have to try to apologize for everything? I wasn't like it was her fault, no that's right it was Yuki it was all that stinkin' rats fault!

"Whatever cook them then, see if I care" I told her

"Haha! Kyo's totally in love with Tohru!" laughed Momiji in a sing-song voice, I knew I was crimson now, and I was pissed

"YOU LITTLE BRAT. WHY WOULD I LIKE TOHRU LIKE THAT! AND WHY ARE YOU EVEN HERE!" he laughed and shrugged

"GET OVER HERE!" I grabbed him and hit him on the head, immediately the annoying whining and crying came

"WAAAHHH! WAAAHHHH! KYO HIT ME! WAAH WAHH!" Shigure covered his ears with his hands

"Kyo, for once, when Momiji's over could you try not to beat on him?"

"Is that for your sake or for Momiji's sake?" I asked angrily

"hehe, weeellllllll…" he got that stupid look on his face

"Of course, tell me when dinner's ready, I'm outta this freak show" I told them, then I ran outside and climbed onto the roof, I laid down and folded my hands under my head then looked up at the night sky.

"Every star is different you know?" came the nostalgic sounding voice of Tohru, her eyes were kind of glazed over, she must be thinking about her mom…

"Hey Tohru, about earlier…" she made a shushing noise and just smiled

"Don't worry! Its fine, I get it, your tired from school, and training? I told Momiji to cut you some slack. What did he say to you anyways? I was in the kitchen and all I could hear was your yelling…" I breathed a sigh of relief she hadn't heard? Good, than at least Momiji hadn't caused as much trouble as I had thought

"Well, I guess its fine…" I heard giggling and Shigure's head popped up at the edge of the roof, Momiji was with him and that damn rat too

"Well Tohru was the only one who hadn't heard" said Momiji mischievously, Shigure was snickering like a kid and Yuki was giving me the worst death glare I had ever received from him, I glared back. Somehow Tohru didn't see any of this, probably to wrapped up in thinking about her mom again. I wondered how did this girl always stay so cheerful? I mean she's had nothing but trouble time and time again…

"Hey, um… how are things?" I asked, she smiled

"Things are good, I got a hundred on a really hard test, and Uo-chan and Hana-chan invited me to go play with them after school tomorrow. I finally paid off the last of the debt for the school trip, and of course I've got you guys, I mean who wouldn't be happy living here with all of you?" hmm… looking at all the good things, just like always… I know I wouldn't like to live here, but of course, Tohru made things bearable. I smiled, a rare thing for me

"Hey, Tohru, I have something I need to tell you…" I could feel my face starting to burn at the prospect of admitting my feelings, but I couldn't give up

"What? What's the matter Kyo?" she asked

"Nothing's the matter, just listen, I… I lo-"

"HEY TOHRU THE FOOD IS BURNING!" Shouted Momiji, and Yuki

"Did I leave the heat on high!" she asked in a panicked voice, she stood up frantically,

"AHH! I got to go inside and turn it off before, I light the kitchen on fire!"

"Uhh…! Tohru, wait it's just I need to let you know something… I really lov-"

"THERE'S A FIRE!" came the shout

"MY HOUSE!" whined Shigure. They planned this, they planned everything, it was Yuki, there was no one else as mean as that damned rat. They had to be planning this… I would never get enough courage to tell her again! I had to say something.

"Tohru, wait! It's just, … … ARGH! I LOVE YOU OKAY? THAT'S ALL I WANTED TO SAY" she stood there dumbstruck, a blush creeping up her neck

"Hehe, what do you mean?" she asked

"Just what I said! Couldn't you hear me! I … I love you"

"I love you too!" she replied a worried look on her face, I was surprised

"You do?"

"Yes, I also love Yuki, Shigure, Momiji, Hatori, Kagura, Ayame, Hotsuharu, Ritsue, Hiro, and Kisa!" I groaned

"That's not the type of love I meant…"

"Then what…?" I pulled her close and quickly kissed her before I changed into my zodiac animal. Then face burning, I leapt off the roof, and sprinted away. I could smell the smoke of the burning dinner from far away, I sighed, what had I done? I couldn't return there. Maybe I could go and train in the mountains again, or something… I didn't know, and right now I didn't really care, I just ran as if my life depended on it. The rain began, great the weather just had to get better didn't it? I thought sardonically, I … I couldn't go back there; I was now completely alone… Akito must be laughing right now; she'd be grinning with her poisonous smile, and in her overly gentle but subliminally venomous voice she would say that I deserved this. She would laugh at my pain, and that damned Yuki would probably join her, I hated them both more than anything right now…

…

About a week later I was hunched down in the cold air, rain pelting me. I had my fur fluffed up for warmth, but the wind cut right through my protection and attacked me. I shivered, I had lost the will to try to do much, days ago, the loneliness was crushing, and my heart was dead, aching in my sadness

"Get up you wuss of a cat" came the monotonous voice of Hotsuharu, I looked up at him others were with him but I couldn't make out their faces

"Why are you here? Leave me alone!" I yelled weakly,

"You're worse than a little kid, really running away from home at your age?" his voice was patronizing now

"Don't you treat me like a kid!" I shouted

"Then don't act like one stupid" he reached down to pick me up, I slashed at his hand, blood trickled out of the wound I had just given him, I could almost hear a *snap* his eyes narrowed and hard lines were etched onto his face

"Look here we came all the way up here to pick you up, so you should at least be grateful! You little –"

"Relax Haru, he's not even worth it, why don't we just go home, and tell Tohru that the little prick was too scared of facing the situation he made. Or maybe I'll just say he was too busy fighting bears to give a shit" that voice! A snarl ripped from my throat and my hackles were raised

"DAMN YOU YUKI! I'M NOT SCARED, AND I'M NOT FIGHTING BEARS!" he looked at me with his cold eyes

"Say what you will cat, but I can say what I want, remember that" with that he turned around and began to leave, dammit now I had to leave, who knows what kind of lies he might feed her.

"Fine _rat _I'll come." He smiled coldly

"Thought so, now let's go, I'm soaked" he walked away, Haru followed him, but one person was left behind with me to follow; Kagura. '_just my luck' _I thought, but she didn't say anything, she just looked at me sadly and picked me up, I was about to say 'let go of me, I can walk you know' but she seemed really disheartened, maybe she had found out about what I had confessed, she probably had, damn that Yuki.

"Look, Kagura…" I started

"Kyo, don't bother. Just don't bother, it's better that way." She told me. I fell limp, I had really hurt her, I felt guilty, and suddenly I could stand to have her holding me, I busted out of her grasp and ran.

The rain kept falling, and I kept running, paw step, paw step, just keep going… keep going… I was almost at the house, when I felt it.

Energy rippled throughout my body, and I was flung from the ground, landing a few feet away I withered in pain, I smelt burnt flesh, that was probably my own, I felt sick and light-headed, all I could remember was seeing myself completely alone as the darkness trickled into my sight, soon the black took over everything and I closed my eyes, there was nothing. I was nothing, the loneliness of it all crushed me. but there wasn't a thing I could do, I had left life behind, along with the scars of my horrid mistakes.

Only the coldness and blackness remained.

Not even I remained.

I was gone.

**Well, I'll tell you one thing, I sure as hell did not see that coming. And I'm the author! I hope this story didn't suck too bad for you, if you could, reviewing would be nice… please?**


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